I grew up in a little village very far of the towns
At those times, 40 years ago, people were not the same, you could enter in each house without knocking on the door because they were never locked.
All the children of village just get out to play together and nobody was looking at them, we just came back at the falling of the day the knees full of scratches at it was ok.
Most of people there were farmers and we had one doctor and one lawyer for all the villages around.
I don't know how old you are, but have to understand that, at those times several things were easier.
as a little girl I was used to go to play with boys, to do bicycles, climb to the trees, and do forbidden things, as enter by night in the church, make jokes to neighbours and steal cigarettes and bottles to our parents...
They were several events all year long, were we could meet children from other villages, and it was fun to do with them things we won't with those of the village.
At 8 year old, it was a game for me to show to boys what was under my dress if the boys show me their penis
and for sure, we were proud to drink lots of beers and wines we stole earlier in the evening
but it was just showing what was between my legs and drinking one or two bottles of wine at with eight or nine boys
What ever, the taste of those thing pleased me a lot
so at 10 at each event, I had so friend that I attracked behind a grange or a ranch, to suck them in exchange of a full bottle just for me. Most of them were older than me, between 13 and 15 y.o.
So I could have what I was searching without any risk to get caught while stealing a bottle.
at those time it was legal for "teen" to order soft alcohol in bars when they were 13 y.o., now it's 15 to order a single lager beer
that's why, as my friends were older than me, at 12 my parents let me go village parties
they were parties for teens and young people of the villages that were turning from village to village each week end, they were building a great tent, you know as for the circus, and there was a bar and a DJ in it.
Entrance was free, but my parents gave me 100 FB each week end to go there, that means 5 soft drinks as 5 cola or 5 beers If I could proof I was over 13...
So, as it was the friends I was used to suck for booze, you can imagine I never go to the bar to order drinks... They were just offer me as many beers I wanted to fuck me.
During the rest of the week, when I was at school, there was a kind of small cafe in front the school, and I was one of them who left school to go there. I used the 100 FB that my parents me to play cards, the looser offer the drinks to the others, and I didn't often loose.
But I was in a rage when I lost them on a Monday... Because if I played well and I was lucky, I could drink 5 beers at each lunch time, each day.
At those time people were allowed to smoke in cafe, so I also started to smoke, and it's at that moment, that I started to request gifts from boys, to pay my cigarettes, to pay my drinks... I didn't had sex with them, but I was that kind of bitch who let dream boys of a kiss to get what I wanted.
At school and at home I was an angel, my parents and my teachers were proud of me, but as soon out I was a rebel
smoking, drinking, having sexy clothes...
It was so easy to unbutton a shirt to tie it just under my breast and return my dress to make it shorter...
and that drive us when I was 15...
every Thursday, my parents ere out to get dance lessons, they only come back home after midnight, and as a wise girl I wa ssupposed to be in bed when they'll be back...
We were in a village, impossible to do a single thing without everybody knew it so I was stucked at home
so the best plan was to buy (or steal) a bottle of liquor in the store near school, hide it in my schoolbag; and at the evening as soon my ^parents had left, drinking and masturbate while watching my father's VHS
As I had to make the bottle disappear for the next day and I refused to waste booze by throwing a not empty bottle, I forced me to drank it all each Thursday
sometime so drunk that was I was unable to rewind VHS, before trying to hide it in my father's secret place
In my memories, I threw up three times, first one I had to run to the garden, second time I was in toilets, and thrid times my parents were already at home and threw up from my bedroom window
that drives us now to the shocking part...
I was used to insert in me all what I could find to masturbate while wtaching my father's VHS, and yes, sometimes the vegetables that will be served for dinner the next day...
but we had a young golden retriever, and it was at this time my best friend... If you understand what I mean?
it was young and very hot... and me I was young too, very drunk, and needing sex...
So I let it fuck me every Thursday as soon I was drunk
The first time I was in a shame and a few angry against it, and I get phone call to a friend asking to come in my house to fuck me instead.
But one day, my friend wasn't able to come home and by rage, I put me in position to fucked by the dog and it began a ritual...
When I've been 18, I left home to go university.
we have here small appartements rent to students. We call them kot, I don't know if you have such things in Germany
somes are located in party places for students.
Mine was just outside, one of the greatest party place of all Europ! I'm not kidding, 80 bars in a small neighborhood of 5 street as an "H"
my parents were worried to let me alone in such a bad place, so I request for them a big dog, a dalmatian, to protect me. If they only knew... As soon I woke up, I rush in the place drink until had passed out so many times, that guys had to carry me until my kot.
sometimes I woke up in the middle of the day, sometimes in the middle of the night, but each time, first thing I did was to go drinking.
as, with that rythm I was on the point ruin my studies, after the first year, I asked to th epresident of the university to change my studies from medecine to nusery but let me pass, and he did.
I've been very lucky to success my studies, I cheated as hell, and had lots of boys to fill exams for me event if I was not present.
this how I received my first diplomas, but a nurse wasn't something good enough for my father who asked me to get another studies, I started lawyer studies, with the same life... So I finished secretary for lawyer office.
I finished my studies, and just after, as everybody was knowing me, I started to work in bars.
yes I just chug a few vodka
at this time a bartender was just overpaid, I worked one night on two for a full wage and I earned more than my father. so one night I was drinking for work, the night after I was drinking for fun
it was a great life, until one day I had an opportunity to get my own bar, I talked to it to my father, I had the money to do it alone, my parents did'nt knew what kind of life I had, but he refused...
he called once of his friends and got me a job in a hospital.
I had no choice, I just had to leave all what I had built because even if I was a hard drinker, I was a hard worker too
I didn't knew the chance it was going to be.
the first day I came to sign my contract employees were on strike, I just signed the form, and they asked me to come back the day after.
The next day I arrived at work, some were already knew me, I had served them several times, but they gave me nothing to do. I just stay there without nothing to do, and it was the same the following days...
So as I was receiving, my wage, I said nothing, just used the money to party, and some night work again in bars. I just had to be on time to validate the machine for my scheludes at "arriving, and "leaving"
in fact, I was just rushing out the bar, driving as I could to hospital, validate two times per day and drinking and passing out the rest of the time.
As doctors didn't knew me when they received a form to validate my job, they just put me a 10 in each cases.
the days I wasn't wasted I came to hospital to go to coffee corner, laughing with colleagues, hiring news, talking about people I had never saw, and for sure stealing drugs.
you cannot imagine hwo many drugs I stole, so many that I had no memories of what I did during three complete months
it happened to me several times to be so wasted that I was litterally crawling to get out of my car to validate the scheludes
Other times I was staggering so much that I was hanging the walls to walk and I wasn't able to focus the machine to validate.
On day I wasted as hell, when I heard somebody coming in the stairs, I hide myself behind a door and the people just stopped to talk in the entrace of the hall, I was high as hell, trying to make no noise and I peed on me, they noticed nothing. I was so proud to not had been caught that the days after, I arrived again higher and drunker.
I remember a day, once I had validate my scheludes, I climbed in my car and wasn't able to pass the back rear, I hit the wall in front of me several times before be able to leave carpark
But as every good thing must end, I started to notice that I had took some weight, I din't care about it in the first times.
I had forgot to tell you that during the times I was working in bars, I was used to have sex daily with several men, some used condom, somes didn't, and the reason why I had request a dog from my parent, was that I learned that dog sperm is the best contraceptive ever.
The time I realised I was pregnant and the time I planned an appointment with a doctor, I was 6 month pregnant.
Impossible to hide it, but I was sure that I could do it
so as I had been stupid enough to go to the hospital where I was supposed to work for the exam, the direction knew I was pregnant
And they search somebody to replace me during the pregnancy, and by searching they realised I never worked, so, to not have problem with administration, they just ask me to never come back to hospital again and pay me during 6 more months.
And this is how my son birth, with me unable to not partying, because I was cut off my drug supplying job.
following years, I just try to keep jobs as long as possible before getting fired because I arrived wasted at work too many times, or because I passed out at work (I have so much fun stories about those times).
and now the next shocking part
all long my son was a baby, I didn't care of getting drunk or high in front him, even not to get sex in front him because I thought he will not remember.
I was sure that one day, I'll be able to stop all and have a normal life, but it was so fun to play with his innocence.
For example, when he was 3 y.o., I was used to take with me in bars all night long, and to ask him if I looked drunk, if I could have so more drinks, if he would be a great boy enough to help me to walk, to insert key in ignition's car, and even after had left bar when I was driving us home, slaloming on the road if he think I could drink again or take some drugs...
Until one morning, he was 5 or 6 he started to talk to me about what happened with the men past night.
So i decided to never get men at home anymore, and I started to go to sexclubs, and except by accident, he never saw me got fucked anymore.
But he saw me coming back home in the early morning, totally trashed, clothed as a bitch, when I wasn't half nude or totally naked, soemtimes coverd of sperm or pee, begging him to serve me one last drink or to help me to have some lines.
And the life continue like this, I got his sister 4 years ago, she is now my new drinking buddy who I ask if I can drink more, and as I'm now pregnant, I'll do the same with her when she'll be born.
